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When Safaris go Hilariously Wrong…and Right.

by on March 24, 2013

While my hunter’s approach to safaris was somewhat successful, I found it to be more time-consuming than I’d hoped and started trying some other approaches. Ultimately I ended up in a corp full of noobs with nothing I cared to shoot at, and idled there for two weeks cooling my heels and improving the look of my employment history. During that time, I noticed a four-person mining op and made a note to apply to that corp. I eventually did, and after being reminded that I needed to drop roles I got accepted.

I immediately located their mining op for the night: two Procurers and a Fenrir. Circumstances resulted in me landing shortly after one of the barges left; that was okay, as they were targets of opportunity. I was after the freighter. I quickly popped the Procurer and turned on the Fenrir, at which point I had this conversation with its pilot:

victim > what do you want?
Safari Alt > 500 million isk.
victim > ok fine
victim > but i want to keep my fenirr this time
victim > seriously this is getting annoying
Safari Alt > I’m pretty sure I’ve never done this to you.
victim > fine let me dock first then you get money
Safari Alt > …
Safari Alt > That’s not how this works.
victim > last time this happened i didn’t get to keep my fenirr
victim > I promise ill give you the money
Safari Alt > I’ve heard that can happen.
Safari Alt > Not everyone is quite as honest with ransoms. I’m just in it for the money.
victim > k ill give you half now half when my ship is in dock
Safari Alt > Understand that if you try to cross me, you’ll never be able to undock again.
victim > does that work?
Safari Alt > Sure.

At this point, I kept shooting him. 250 million was a decent bounty, and I got back to the killing.

victim > i gave you the money, now let me og
victim > come on
Safari Alt > I’m being advised by my mentor to demand the other 250.

…and he pays me again. I’m up to 500 mil. At some point during this negotiation, a corpmate in a Vexor engages me, and is followed by the other Procurer. That’s right, they brought a Procurer full of drones to try to save the freighter. These guys are…special.

victim > ok now stop
Safari Alt > Hmm…nah.
Safari Alt > He says up the price for making me wait.
victim > šŸ˜¦
victim > ehh
Safari Alt > 200 mil more.
victim > now i gotta buy another fenrir šŸ˜¦
victim > imma run outa cash soon
victim > I like to keep enough cash in my wallet to replace my ships
victim > …
victim > please stop
victim > this is annoying
victim > if you guys want money ill give you that
victim > this is just inconvient
Safari Alt > 200 mil more and I go away.
Safari Alt > Better hurry.
victim > yeah im not falling for that again
Safari Alt > v0v
victim > look just stop
victim > ill give you monthly isks

He’s desperate. He’s begging. He’s at half structure. And then his friends show up. Two Dominix land and rep his armor. I can’t break the tank, so I just sit and hold him. Maybe I can win the waiting game. After maybe 10 minutes of stalemate, a neutral Falcon arrives and jams me. Suddenly there’s a criminal falcon on the field and the Fenrir is escape.

So I didn’t kill the fenrir, but I did kill two procurers, a vexor, the vexor pilot’s capsule, got 500 million isk, and killrights on a falcon pilot. Also, did you notice that part about all this happening “again”? This same guy lost a Fenrir in a war to some other guys, who also ransomed him for 500 mil before killing it. During the action, one of those individuals contacted my safari alt to tell me how hilarious it was what I was doing. So on top of the great story, half billion isk, and killrights, I also got to recruit a new person to the Belligerents community. It was a pretty good night.

I managed to avoid being kicked from corp for a day and decided to shop for a new corp. Setting my sights on mission corps, I browsed the recruitment listings and checked out their membership on evewho. Finally I found a small-ish corp with a number of old characters with high sec status. I cold applied to the corp and after a short conversation and minor sob story about how hard it is to find a good active mission corp, I was accepted.

I decided to get some intel. Apparently three of them were running missions in a system, two in tengus and one in a Damnation. I figured it was time to bring in some backup. I poked the Belligerents to line up some reps and see if we could get a second ship in with heavier neuts to shut down the active tanks. None other than Psychotic Monk was able to get into the corp with me, bringing his Prophecy to the party.

So we found them hanging out in a grav site in a Venture, a Damnation, and a Tengu. We got the two shiny boats tackled and tore down the Damnation first. It took some time for us to get ourselves sorted and get his tank shut down…and then we got the kill:

kill - damnation kill - damnation pod

We then spent the next 20 minutes shotting a Tengu that was so cap-stable he could tank us even with the Prophecy’s neuts on him. He finally died after we hit the Orca, refitting for webs, a target painter, more neuts and a resupply of drones. That kill wasn’t worthy of a screenshot beyond the 100,000 real damage it tanked before we finally broke its capacitor. During the fight we also killed an Incursus that showed up to try to help; sometimes they just want to die with their friends I suppose.

Monk and I were both awarded medals for being bad people. We’re still in the corp.

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One Comment
  1. lol, “we’re still in the corp”

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